June 24, 2022
You do know that overturning these decisions doesn’t just mean that abortion will now be illegal in 13 states and soon in 26 - you know that, right? It means that birth control of any sort will now be open for new rulings. Do you think that this is just about aborting a pregnancy? It is not. This is about all of women’s agency in their own bodily autonomy and in all types of “family planning”.
You also know that this opens the door for other civil rights SCOTUS rulings to be overturned - you know that, right? There are lawmakers who have said out loud - this year - in 2022 - that the legality of interracial marriage should be left up to individual states.* What will the 14th Amendment even mean anymore?
And where do I stand? Today. On the topic of Roe v. Wade.
(The following scenarios are all people I know, people who have shared their stories with me - some whom I have walked with through these stories. These aren’t made up.)
I stand with B and R who both chose to carry unviable pregnancies to birth, and to name the baby and say goodbye.
I stand with K who chose to terminate an unviable pregnancy at five months and to name the baby and say goodbye.
I stand with B who was able to terminate am ectopic pregnancy that would have caused extreme medical issues and possibly even her death.
I stand with A who chose to terminate a pregnancy when she was in an abusive relationship. [In the US, women who are pregnant or were pregnant in the past 42 days (the post-partum period) die by homicide at more than twice the rate that they die of bleeding or placental disorders — the leading causes of what are usually classified as pregnancy-related deaths. Also, becoming pregnant increases the risk of death by homicide: between the ages of 10 and 44 years, women who are pregnant or had their pregnancy end in the past year are killed at a rate 16% higher than are women who are not pregnant.]+
I stand with B who, as a junior in high school, chose to carry a pregnancy to term and have her baby be adopted.
I stand with K and R who, as seniors in high school, chose to carry their babies and raise them - who both celebrated those babies graduating from high school this spring.
I stand with M who as a seventh grader was able to terminate a pregnancy and have some more days of childhood.
I stand with all the girls who refuse to be victims in rape or non-consensual sex, who use plan B so that what is already a situation they have to deal with mentally and physically does not become a situation they are stuck in forever.
I stand with J who has adopted two kiddos and taken on all of their physical, mental, and emotional trauma and also all their joys and laughter, and continues to help them find their wins.
I stand with X who was adopted, abused by her adoptive parents, and is now, as an adult, working at healing.
I stand with E who, after two very high risk pregnancies and births, was able to have a procedure to ensure she would never be pregnant again.
I stand with H and every woman who has decided that they have been pregnant enough times and have procedures done to ensure they will not become pregnant again.
I stand with S and B and J who have been able to decide to not bear children.
I stand with any woman who uses birth control with or without her partner’s knowledge.
I stand with any woman who has sat tearfully alone, or with a doctor at any type of pregnancy care clinic, or, if they are so blessed, with people who love them dearly, and talked through options and made hard decisions.
Today, I’m gutted. The “E” - that’s me. That’s my story. The procedure that allowed me to never become pregnant again - that maybe saved my life - and that certainly allowed me to be present for the two dear ones I birthed, could very well become illegal. I am so grateful that I had this choice. Others should have this choice, too.
Where do I stand?
I stand on the conviction that NONE of these stories should have been mandated or legislated. I stand on the conviction that these choices all belong to the person who would become, or is already, pregnant and the healthcare personnel they trust. That’s it. That’s all. That’s where I stand.
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* Sen. Mike Bruan, R, Indiana, remarks
and this op-ed piece (with lots of links to research and supporting documentation)
+ Homicide is a Top Cause of Maternal Death in the US