bits of sunshine

judging by the feel of the laundry

all the shoes are too small, too tight 
some of the pants are too short 
and i've been weeding t-shirts out as i do laundry  
you know that feeling of folding a shirt for your boy
and it looks so small, feels so small in your hands 
but you remember, like it was yesterday,
when that shirt was new
and it looked so big, felt so big in your hands 
and now this little shirt is the reason your throat is going all tight and your eyes sting just a little 
and it doesn't have anything to do with the silly shirt, really 
and everything to do with the boy
who used to be a toddler
and before that a baby
and before that he lived inside you for nine whole months
and now he is this tall, skinny, muscular six and a half year old
and there is no way he'd ever fit anywhere inside you,
except in your heart where he'll always, always be,
even when he grows all the way taller than you 
and just doesn't stop . . .
that's gonna happen to me someday . . .
someday pretty soon, i think,
judging by the way the laundry feels when i fold it right now . . .

dishes at 6 am

dish mountain
:: sunday lunch for 4 people
:: sunday supper for 6 people - with coffee + dessert
:: monday breakfast for 3 people
:: monday lunch - picnic packed for 4 people
:: monday supper for 4 people

no soap for the dishwasher
a marriage counseling session that went late into the evening
working sunday night
sleeping just a few hours monday morning
bringing lunch to ben
playing with isaac while maddie had her piano lesson
and enjoying the awesome weather
meant a big pile of dishes on my counter
but i tackled them this morning at 6:00
and though i was not wide awake when i started
by the time i was done and had only clean dishes on my counter
i was feeling pretty fine

it didn't hurt that i got to visit with ben the whole time i washed  ;)

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happy tuesday, my friends.  i hope you are feeling pretty fine, as well.
love, ~e

the earth keeps turning

on the other side of the globe
it is spring 
new, fresh 
gold to green 
here, on this side,
it is fall 
worn, tired 
green to gold 

and the earth keeps turning

so many people say fall is their favorite season 
i'm not those people 
yes, there is a beauty to the fall,
but i am a summer, sunshine girl
through and through

this year, the shortening days have really been weighing on me 
i don't just get to hunker in to home 

now, instead of it being twilight when i leave for work,
it's pitch dark
and has been for hours already 
but i leave my cozy home
and my family
and drive away into the cool darkness
to take care of somebody else's mother, father, sister, brother, grandma, grandpa . . .

i'm happy to do it 
to give the care 
and i am so grateful for my job 
it really is a good one 

and i can never let go of the fact that God truly did put me right where i am
right now 
he knew what it would be like for me to sleep at random
and he has graciously kept me healthy
(i used to get so sick if i didn't get enough sleep 
not anymore) 
he knew what it would be like for maddie and isaac to have to do their thing while i sleep 
and what it would be like to teach my kiddos
and keep my home
and love my husband
and work overnights 
and, and, and,

he knew

and his grace is sufficient 
always his grace is sufficient
and his mercies are new every morning
and evening
and in the middle of every night

this is a season
there is some change in the works
(isn't there always, for us?)
and i can choose to live this season patiently, sweetly, purely, lovingly
(thank you, elissa)
by the grace and mercy of my Father
the Father of lights
in whom there is no shadow or turning

but here, on earth
for everything
turn, turn, turn
there is a season
turn, turn, turn
and a time to every purpose under heaven

i have percieved that there is nothing better
than for them to be joyful
and to do good as long as they live

on this earth that is turning

to be joyful

and to do good

as long as i live

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Lamentations 3:22-24, James 1:17, Ecclesiates 3:1+12

onions: or, i don't cry anymore when i cut them

it used to be, whenever i tried to dice up an onion, my eyes ran and ran and stung so bad they'd just close up tight . . .

but now, see that core sitting on the counter next to my cutting board?  yes.  onions have a core.  and if i don't cut into it, i don't cry.  my eyes hardly even sting.

and it doesn't matter what kind of onion it is.

it works.

hurray!

.. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. ..

it's so windy today, it sounds like our house is going to blow right off the hill. 

yesterday we cleaned and cleaned and cleaned.  this morning, i just need to do the floors.  everything else is spick and span.  (let's see how long we can make it last? . . . )

maddie started choir last week,  isaac started this week.  they both love it.

look at Madelaine Reads later today for an update.  we've got a few reviews lined up for you.

i work tonight and tomorrow night.  cross your fingers that i get a nap today?

i don't have to work this weekend.  that will be awesome.

eating breakfast with ben is the best.  i got to today.  i made coffee and english muffins.  he made hashbrowns (from scratch) and scrambled eggs with onions, ham and cheese.  what a good start to the day!

have a happy wednesday, friends!

love, ~e

I Like . . . Mondays

{joining Anja . . .}

I like . . .

. . . strawberry gum 
. . . dew-drops in early morning light 
. . . giving gifts (little packages, the last flowers from my wild hillside, goodies . . . ) 
. . . Bird in a Box by Andrea Davis Pinkney
. . . this quote:  Sometimes the best fight is no fight at all. 
                        Even a bird in a box can get free if he uses his wits, if he doesn't ram at the walls around him.

 

some birthday gifts

{made by maddie and i for a dear friend}

two dangers

 
there are two dangers in not living close to the land.  one is the danger of supposing that breakfast comes from the grocery, and the other is that heat comes from the furnace.

to avoid the first danger, one should plant a garden, preferably where there is no grocer to confuse the issue.

to avoid the second, he should lay a split of good oak on the andirons, preferaby where there is no furnace, and let it warm his shins while a blizzard tosses the trees outside.  if one has cut, split, hauled, and piled his own good oak, and let his mind work the while, he will remember much about where the heat comes from, and with a wealth of detail denied those who spend the weekend astride the radiator.

from A Sand County Almanac by Aldo Leopold

{i was saving this bit for when it got cold out . . .  well, we had a fire in the stove on thursday morning and another on friday and we'll be putting up wood this weekend . . . so, here it is . . . it's cold out}

.: a girl who is 8 :.

(which means i am mom to an 8 year-old, which is crazy to me) 

{Madelaine on September 9, 2011 - her 8th birthday - on the shore of the harbor in Grand Marais, MN}

she is so grown up in so many ways 
so beautiful 
often i can see just what she'll look like at 18 
and yet so silly
and such a sweet little 8 year-old  girl  

for her birthday i found a card that says:

it's the little things that make life so sweet

and we wrote little things she does that we love:
playing piano
singing
her laugh
the kind things she does for others
her cool outfits
how she loves frogs  
the way she empathizes with the people she loves 
the way she loves Jesus
the notes she writes
the loads of laundry she does 
all her help in the kitchen 
the times she helps isaac pick up his messes 
the little gifts she puts together on random days 
all her coloring and drawing 
reading, reading, reading

it was so fun to watch her read her card
the little half smile on her face
the knowledge that we all love her so very much

Happy New Year, Miss Maddie-Moo.  Happy Birthday, to you.

two gifts

well hello there, my friends.

i started this post over a week ago . . . and life gets so full . . . but. i still want to tell you about the first weekend in september.  so here goes.

that weekend was long, and full, but really, it was very good.

i worked friday night. i asked around to try to find out why vacation for november 11 + 12 had been denied me.  (ben is officiating a wedding that weekend for some very dear friends of ours.)  the conclusion was that another night NA must already have vacation that weekend.  bummer.  the rest of the night went very well.  and i didn't have to stay in the morning! 

i headed home to find our dear friends B +L making breakfast with my husband.  their kiddos G, W, E + J were playing quietly in my living room, and my kiddos were slowly waking up downstairs.  after a bit of a visit, i put my pj's on and headed over to my mom and dad's house.  after a visit with them, i disappeared into their very dark, very quiet guest bedroom.  i knew that Ben and B were heading off to work, i knew that L was watching over my kiddos in their play with her kiddos, and i knew that my mom and dad were bumping around their home and then i snuggled in under two quilts - one made by friends of my mom, one made by my great grandma Heddi, and i fell asleep.  deeply, soundly asleep. 

i woke at 3:00.  my mom had made peach pie, my dad had made coffee.  we three shared our pie and coffee, then i returned home, well-rested and rejuvenated. 

at home i found L and her sister and seven happy kids.  L asked me if i was sure i had slept long enough and restfully, that is what she had prayed for me.  absolutely her prayer had been answered.  and she was a great vessel in that answer.  i knew my kiddos were safe and happy with her and hers. 

after i showered, L and i made supper and our Bens returned from a productive day.  after we cleaned up from supper, we all headed outside with our coffee, to sit around a campfire and visit and laugh until our cheeks hurt from the smiling and the joy. 

i had to work again on saturday night.  i was sad to leave the campfire and all the friends, especially the little E who had been my little shadow all evening.  but how grateful i had been for such a restful and lovely day. 

upon arriving at work, another wonderful L in my life told me that she was the NA with vacation on november 11 + 12, but that she would be willing to give the days to me!!!  she is so good to me.  and i am so very grateful.

we had another just fine night of work on saturday.  in the morning i crawled into bed next to Ben for two hours.  then we got up, and went out for brunch.  i ate french toast with apple butter and maple syrup (if you've never tried that, try it!) and two sausage patties.  when we left the restaurant, Ben just kept driving.  we listened to music and drove and talked until we arrived at a store where we could watch people wearing expensive blue jeans spending money hand over fist and our kiddos could ride a big ferris wheel for a dollar each.  :)

when we arrived home, i made a peach pie - oh. yum.  and after supper, Ben and i sat down with two more dear friends who we are doing marriage counseling for (Ben is going to officiate their wedding in november!) and it was so good to share with them and to hear their hearts for God and for each other. 

did i really title this post two gifts??  the whole weekend was a whole lot of blessings all rolled into a few short days.  the two gifts i had in mind when i started writing were L and L.  i am so very grateful for them and what they did for me this weekend.  they are both growing to be such dear friends to me.  but if i read back over what i just wrote, i could title this post forty-two gifts, or something like that.  ;) 

continuing to focus on doing fine and being grateful,
with much love,
~e

lonesome blue

missing you

back soon with post after post after post . . .