{photo by Maddie}
i need to focus on what i am grateful for,
every day,
not on what is hard.
i have felt so inadequate lately about so many things,
have felt out of control,
have tried to figure myself out,
what's wrong with me,
why can't i take my own advice,
the advice i give others,
the advice i believe to be true.
i said to ben the other day: i know i need to do better.
he said: you need to give yourself a break.
you do so many things.
and we don't do things like everybody else.
(who is everybody else, anyway?
i sure haven't figured out who they are,
but the idea that they are there can be so overwhelming!)
you can't compare yourself to anybody else.
we have decided that there are things -
our marriage,
our kids,
relationships with the people God has put in our lives -
that are the most important to us.
the other stuff just has to fill in the cracks that are left.
and when we run out of cracks,
there will be things that just don't get done.
or get done later.
and that's ok.
it really is.
you need to focus every day on what you do get done
on what you are grateful for
on everything that's good,
on what you believe.
and i do believe this:
things are getting better.
i am doing just fine.
my kiddos are doing just fine.
just fine should never be confused with perfectly.
perfect should never be the goal.
admitting that you need to do better
is better than pretending you will, tomorrow.
i need to think about the gentleness i would show a friend
and allow that gentleness in myself, for myself.
i think we all do.
don't you?
{inspiration (and some of the words) for this post here on a lovely new-to-me blog}