Bits of Sunshine

this sweet moment

 :: my beautiful sister and her sweet gal ::

{joining soulemama and so many lovely ladies . . .}

this moment

joining soulemama today . . .

what moment would you like to remember?

fresh air in the grey woods

i am grateful for :

• our dog
• colorful jackets
• rosy cheeks

choosing

I added a button to the sidebar on my blog::

I've been seeing it on some of my favorite blogs and clicked over to Erin's Bluebirdbaby and read her post on choosing, consciously choosing happiness, joy, love, goodness, awesomeness.

She writes:: I'm reminded every single day I come on here, that I can choose. And that's what I do. I consistently choose, because that's our gift. And I don't want to waste such a wonderful gift as that. Would you?!

I am resonating with the reminder to choose to think on the lovely, the admirable, the true, the excellent, the praiseworthy.  (Philippians 4:8)

We all know that life is still going to hand us hard situations.  Really hard ones.  Some are long-lasting (tough relationships, chronic illness, grief), others are short-lived (like Isaac's root canal yesterday), but they'll come.  As long as we live and breathe, there will be heavy hard things that come.

And we can choose how we respond.  We can look for the bit of goodness (a favorite cup of coffee, the smile of a friend, a bit of hand-work, a hug from a kiddo or a spouse).  We can choose where we put our focus.  We can feel first and act out of our feelings, or we can choose our actions and our feelings will follow.  They really will.  If I choose to focus on the good (even if the good, right now, is the smell of coffee in my cup), if I choose to focus on that, my mood is lighter, my responses to my husband and my kids and other people I have to deal with are more gentle and kind.

I can choose joy.  I can choose goodness.  I can choose peace.  I wrote a post about this a while ago.  It's a list of choices that I revisit, that I should revisit more often.  I've put a button on my sidebar for this list of choices, as well::

you are welcome to use this button if you wish

<a href="http://bitsofsunshine.typepad.com/bits_of_sunshine/2009/08/morning-reflection-.html"><img
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Today I am choosing joy and peace in spite of another grey, cold day and a little boy who is having a difficult time doing anything other than what he wants.  I am refusing to allow his negative attitude dictate our day.  I am choosing to maintain peace and am hopeful that I can help him to choose some joy.  What will you choose today?

root canal

Yep.  A root canal.

On Friday night a little piece of one of Isaac's molars broke off.  And suddenly he was in GREAT pain. 

So I ran to the store and got ibuprophen (we only had acetaminophen at home) and some numbing gel and a tooth patch kit.  And did my best to fix up Isaac's tooth.  All day Saturday and all day Sunday he just wasn't himself and didn't eat very much.

Monday morning we went straight to the dentist.  And found out that my little boy had such deep decay in that little tooth (that needs to last him till he's 12 or so) that he needed a root canal.  So, up in the chair he went.  And oh. terrible.  Apparently when the nerves in a tooth are damaged (which Isaac's were), the medication that is supposed to numb the feeling doesn't work right.   And, ummm, it didn't work right for Isaac.  I wanted to alternately cry and punch the dentist in the face.  Especially when he told Isaac, "You need to stop crying and making noise.  What I'm doing right now doesn't hurt.  I know it doesn't."  Hello!  How does he know that what he's doing doesn't hurt?  His mouth isn't the one stretched open beyond what it should be.  Isaac's mouth is pretty small - and all those tools and things that hold the mouth open aren't tiny.  And I could see that Isaac's cheek and tongue were pinched - they were bleeding for heaven's sake.  I KNOW it hurt.  And yes, Isaac cried the entire time.  But he laid still.  Very still.  His whole little body was tensed and perfectly still.  I was holding his hands and his hands were just tense and straight the whole time.  Only once did he squeeze my hands, and that's when it was REALLY bad. 

I'm sure every parent has times where they just have to stand back and watch something painful happen to their child, because it is for the best.  We needed to get the decay and infection out of Isaac's tooth and have the hole filled and the damaged nerves covered over.  But, oh, the process was painful.  I just held his hands and prayed for him and tried to soothe him.  I didn't deny that it hurt.  I told him that I knew it did and that I was sorry that he had to go through it, but that it would be over and it would feel better when the dentist was done. 

And then I wondered if this was preparing me for something bigger down the road.  Am I the only parent who thinks that way?  Someday will there be something harder to watch and I'll look back and remember holding Isaac's hands through his root canal when he was 6?  And know that we got through that, we'll get through this, too?  I don't think I'm pessimistic.  Just realistic.  I know that hard things happen now and they will probably happen later and we just have to walk through them, together, holding hands, and that it will get better on the other side.

And as of this morning, Isaac says everything is all better!  He rested so well last night and has been chipper and happy and really hungry.  :)