bits of sunshine

the blogger's question

4/21/2010 - a throw-back (with an update below)

Why do I blog?

A friend asked me this a few weeks ago.  Actually she asked how I decided to start blogging. 

How did I decide to start blogging?  Well, my friend Elissa pointed me to Soulemama.com and I started reading her blog and Elissa's blog,
and I thought - people like to read these, they are inspired and encouraged. 
I like to write.  I like to inspire and encourage people. 
And I know the greatest Inspiration and Encourager - and I could share Him. 
So - I started blogging. 
And then, I realized how many of my friends from far away could read about what I have going on. 
And right away - in the first month or two - I had people that I knew and people I had never met
tell me that what I wrote had inspired or encouraged them. 
And that was SO encouraging to me! 
I look at my blog as really a way to be a witness and a testimony. 
And it is a way that I am encouraged. 
I look for the best - the bits of sunshine in my days. 
And I know that if I am having a low, I have people out there will remind me of the bits of sunshine. 
It's SO good!  
And I read so many other mamas who stay home with their familys
and make their homes be a place of peace and comfort. 
And even if all our ideas and ideals don't match up,
it's really nice to know that there are people - all over - who love their familys
and see their homes as a haven
and make do with all sort of interesting thrifty ways of life -
and make it all beautiful. 
It is so fun to be inspired and in turn be an inspiration -
for wife-ing and mama-ing and home-making and home-schooling and playing and living. 
And it is my prayer that Jesus shines through me and my blog, always.

4/21/2022

and here i am in 2022, twelve years later, and a thousand posts later . . . sometimes blogging, sometimes putting thoughts and pictures together on instagram, connecting with friends in real life and through text and on facebook, and sometimes, still on this blog.

i learned so much from the other bloggers i read in those early days. i found recipes and sewing patterns and book suggestions and lesson plans in the blogs that i read. i had stay-at-home moms to learn from, some who were home because of church expectations, but more who were home because that was where they wanted to be. i found community - a community that extended to flickr and then onto instagram - a community of encouragement - a community who has encouraged me to grow. and our on-line interactions have turned into snail mail and texts and phone calls and real-life meet-ups. 

i blog for community, for connection, and to keep record of our days.

a special occasion

don't save something for a special occasion.  

every day of your life is a special occasion.

~thomas monson 

 

love your people.  

hug your people.  

set out the good dishes.  

use the favorite blanket.  

make a special cup of coffee for your best friend.  

buy an ice cream cone for your kiddo.    

sit and talk.  

hold hands.  

do what your heart is telling you to do for the people in your life.  

because every day of your life truly is a special occasion.

beautiful, ordinary magic

parenting teenagers is hard, so very hard

and also beautiful

because they are magic

and they are regular immature humans

sometimess they are good and magic

and sometimes they are more of both and sometimes less of both

sometimes it seems as though the good and the magic are far, far away

and if we love them, we are here for all of it

and we are supposed to guide these magical ordinary creatures

so maybe we need to let them know that the magic is real

even on days when they can't be , or just don't want to be amazing

and the magic is real

even when they disappoint someone else

or themself

even when they aren't and can't be

even when they are most awkward and real

even then, they are magic

 

this afternoon

it was this moment
that i fell in love
all over again.

he had driven me to billings for my EEG,
an early morning on very little sleep,
an appointment that had been double-booked - so they changed mine,
and him just rolling with it,
making things as easy for me as he could,
loving me and loving me and loving me.

once home, we both chose a couch and an afghan and took deep breaths.

i looked at his sleeping face, 
the flecks of grey in his hair,
and thought about the pride he takes in making me happy.
i thought about how present he is in love,
how he is my very best friend.

it was this moment
that i was filled with warm, liquid gratitude
for this love
this life
this man.

sunday evening

more sunshine today. this time with cold wind. 

my family spent quite a bit of time in the backyard. 

brake pads were replaced, paiting done, a new hockey net constructed, and things moved in and out of the garage to make way for the projects.

i spent time editing a college health report for a consulting company.

a dear friend and her daughter brought flowers and coffee and visited for a while - an even brighter spot in an all-around great day - also a bit of a send-off as i head to billings early, early tomorrow for my EEG. 

i've been at my computer long enought today, but wanted to do a little check-in here.

i hope your sunday has had some bright spots, friends.

love, e

 

today

waking up melted into the blankets, laughing but not ticklish

coffee with pancakes, strawberries, and whipped coconut cream

sitting in the truck while ben washes it, then, windows down, driving a ways into the country

smoke billowing into the sky, the fire intentional and controlled

sunshine, warm air, outdoor work to do

hand tools, rusty nails, splintering cedar boards

conversations, some easy, some hard

clouds moving in

grilled burgers, air-fried fries, chopped salad

friends and best friends and how to be a freind

and now, candle lit, rain on the window, just b+e

resting, curled up on the couch, melted into a blanket

 

 

hello april

hello april, hello clouds, hello warm air

hello new page in the calendar

hello graduating from two physical therapy appointments each week to just one a week

hello anxiety over the EEG i have scheduled for the fourth

and hello brain telling my nervous system that there is really nothing to be anxious about - it's just a brain activity study

hello to a whole series of firsts since my stroke - first haircut, first half-mile walks, first days without an assistive walking device (neither walker nor cane)

hello to a whole lot of oppotunities for gratitude - i just know it - thirty days means thirty moments (at the very least) to find joy

hello to the last full month of having two high schoolers in my house - at the end of next month, maddie graduates

hello to the last month before fire season really kicks into gear

hello lots of blank pages and blank blog templates - pages and templates to fill before the end of the month

hello to the envelopes maddie and i will address and send off with her graduation announcements inside

hello to the projects that ben and isaac and maddie and i will do together

hello to flavorful meals and cakes waiting to be made and eaten 

april, you are going to be good, little by little, you are going to be good

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pictures by me, artwork by lori hetteen, flowers from ben, 11:11 for all the best wishes and good luck

 

 

the seasons are changing

february 19 and i am writing that the seasons are changing . . . 

we have noticeably more hours of sunlight than we did just a few short weeks ago. each morning, i get up and walk through the house, turn up the heat and turn on some lights and start the coffee pot. for a few months, the sky is dark, and still dark when i emerge from the shower, get dressed, and pour myself a cup of coffee, the sun not yet up over the horizon line of the neighborhood. for a few weeks, i arrive at work (at 8:00) before the sun has made its appearance. 

each evening, i leave work sometime between 4:30 and 5:15. for a few months, the sky is dark when i am heading home, the sun already low, shining somewhere else, further west.

this morning, i was up at 6:15, the waning moon shining brightly in the lightening western sky, clouds stained pink in the eastern sky, the sun ready to make an appearance over eastern montana before 7:00. 

the air today is warmer, even in the early morning.

and i have a beautiful box of fruit and veggies to eat and share and cook with. the vibrant colors feel like summertime and hope. 

ben headed out early this morning; he'll be teaching all day today and tomorrow. we are already starting into the season where staffing and preparation and fire load will demand that he live and work at the station eighty-six miles northwest of home. fire season used to be shorter, more predictable, late june through mid-september, with a few random fires outside this fairly predictable timeframe. but seasons change. and there have been three fires in the coverage area ben is supervisor for in the last two weeks. in years past, no one in montana would be thinking about preparing a wildland engine and bringing it into service in february. those engines would stay winterized and out of service for at least two months yet. last week, at least one engine up in jordan got prepped and brought into service ready status. the seasons are changing.

maddie will graduate at the end of may. she has her summer job lined up and she knows where she is headed for college in the fall (just across town) and what program of study she will be starting.

isaac has one week of hockey left. next weekend is the state tournament. and then he will be applying for a job. 

i am sorting through pictures and boxes, getting ready to make memory boards to display at graduation parties. and i am going to find a way to spend more time outside and more time writing. i'm not just sure how this will work out, but i need these two things. i feel most alive when i have been out, breathing deep, walking or biking or paddling or sitting with the sun on my shoulders. and i write to find out what i think and to share what i think and how i feel with you. because no one wants to be alone in all of this. and we want to be reminded to notice the moon in the sky, the sun coming up, the color and taste of an orange, the sound of laughter, the changing of seasons. 

today, notice something about the season you are in. notice something that is changing. go gently, love fiercely, and be wonderful.  

 

fullness of joy

you make known to me the path of life in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.

sometimes, i go looking for the joy, seeking the right hand of the creator.

you are my lord. apart from you i have no good thing.

this morning, when i dropped ben off at the office, the sun was just far enough above the horizon to be tinging trees and rooftops the faintest, glowing pink. i turned and drove slowly into the park and watched two white-tail does prance across the snow, ears up, tails lifting and falling, graceful and lithe. 

the lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; indeed i have a beautiful inheritance.

i drove slowly through town, noticing the blue of the sky, the dark of the tree skeletons, the puffs of clouds colored white and grey and pink.

my heart is glad, and my whole being rejoices.

psalm 16

3 december 2021

it gets dark so early now. it is 3:30 pm and already dusk. granted, clouds did roll in this afternoon, but at 1:15, it was so sunny, and now, 3:30 and heading toward dark. we have another eighteen days of shortening daylight. and then it always seems that we don't really feel the days lengthen until we are through january - even though the earth is continually tilting, be it ever so slowly. the way the earth tilts away from the sun is such a strange phenomena. here in montana, we live far enough to the north to really feel the shortening of days. and whoever the decision makers are with the whole daylight savings thing make this darkness set in even earlier. i'd be all for doing away with daylight savings and just going with straight time all year round. seems like all of us would have happier bodies and minds without the twice-a-year switch.

we have had some sickness to fight in our house these past few days - and i feel like i really need to cook us some veggie-filled meals to help bolster our immune systems. maybe a stir-fry is in order tonight or tomorrow - if i have enough energy to chop and fry . . . maybe frozen veggies this time - just because they are already chopped. 

the other morning, the sky put on such a display. i am quite certain the light and the color were a happy birthday wish for ben, and also, that the maker of the whole sky and all of this was sending a blessing to all of us in this in-between sort of time between fall and winter, between thanksgiving and christmas, between night and morning, between longer days and shorter, and whatever all we might find ourselves in between. 

a few weekns ago, a friend asked a question on her facebook - to really know you, what is one thing i need to know about you?

so, i started typing an answer:

i speak or write to find out what i think . . . it is hard for me to process things in my head . . . i need to see or hear the words in order to process . . . so, sometimes, what i say or write initially is hard or extra passionate or some kind of extreme . . . but even if i sound adamant and domineering, i am truly open to having conversations that make me think differently or more broadly.

 

and i thanked her for the question, because in typing those words, i literally just completed a thought that i have been trying to form about myself.

 

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and now - two more thoughts on gratitude.

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as we express our gratitude,
we must never forget the highest appreciation is not to utter words,
but to live them.
~jfk

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you will be enriched in every way
so that you can be generous on every occasion,
and through us your generosity will result in thanksgiving to God.
this service that you perform is not only supplying the needs of the Lord’s people
but is also overflowing in many expressions of thanks to God.
2 corinthians 9:11-12