so, on saturday afternoon, after ben did a bunch of yard-work and brush-clearing, and the kids played baseball and soccer and in the sandbox, and we piled up a big burn pile, and hiked all over our property and found a beaver trail and a coyote bed, ben got the jeep out, and we went for a ride - in the open air - on january 7 - under the rising, almost full, moon.
i must say that this year i do not miss the snow. we've got ice for skating and fishing on. and the sun has been shining and shining and shining. it's like the best parts of fall decided to stay on for a long, long time this year. it's wonderful!
i wrote myself a to-do list for this week. but it was written with sunlight pouring through my window and a lot of things on the list are actually fun - i just need to remember to do them.
i must jaunt off to take maddie to her piano lesson and run an errand that will allow me to cross something off my list. :) i hope that your monday is going along nicely, my friends. mine sure is.
i have a new favorite place to be
it starts and ends in the truck,
ben driving,
me in the passanger seat
happy as a little pea
maddie and isaac sitting side by side in the back seat,
sleeping on top of each other if they got too tired
it involves day packs, or bigger packs, or both
that's where our lunches and raincoats and sunscreen and cameras and maybe our tents
and water - lots of water - can be found
there might be a creek
or a bluff
or a swing
or a beach
or a place to set up our tents
there are for sure four Pattens all together
the way we like it best
and i have lots of stories for you all . . . i'm going to work at telling them . . .
happy Thursday to you, my friends.
love ~e
we've been married almost 10 years.
crazy.
i read this quote:
you have to walk carefully in the beginning of love; the running across fields into your lover's arms can only come later when you're sure they won't laugh if you trip. ~Jonathan Carroll
and thought of us.
i am way past walking carefully
you know me so well
and you would never laugh if i trip
or if it comes out all snappy
or if i hit a post with the car
or if i rip out five hundred thousand stitches in the quilt i'm working on
for no reason other than they just didn't look right
or if a recipe in my mind doesn't translate so well to the plate
or if i want to haul five hundred thousand rocks to work into our landscaping
or if i work on little bits of this and that all morning long and don't ever accomplish one big thing
or if i cut out twenty-five little projects and sew madly on them all evening
and the same from me to you
i would never laugh if you trip
or if you need to put your headphones on and listen to your music too loud
and be somewhere where the phone can't ring and no one can need you for a little while
or if you drink too much coffee
and eat the last bit of dark chocolate out of the cupboard
and i will always let you sleep if you fall asleep on the couch,
but not for more than half an hour
so you aren't too muzzy when you wake up
i love watching you read the Word and underline something here or there
and i love to watch you play with the kids
setting up trains
and teaching checkers and chess
and teaching Maddie to draw
and even you wrestling with Isaac,
even though it scares me -
and i'm not scared that you'll hurt Isaac,
i'm scared that Isaac will hurt you
i love it that you step in and take over for me when i get overwhelmed
and you hit things head-on and cut them down to size
(whether the thing is my to-do list or the man at the bank)
and you treat me with tenderness and gentleness
yet i know that if anyone messed with me or our kids you would tear them to shreds
i love that you live with conviction
conviction that your life is not your own
conviction that you were bought with a price
conviction that your task is to testify
and part of that testimony is the way you are a husband to me
and a father to our kids
you rock at both
i love that we know what each other is thinking most of the time
and we know what to say and do to make each other laugh and take a deep breath and live in joy
i love that we quote really silly movies to each other
and that we quote them with our kids
i love that we don't do things the regular way -
like our first christmas how we couldn't wait to give each other our presents,
so we opened them all at least four days before christmas
and when we decided to get matching wedding bands
we didn't wait until an "important" anniversary
we just went for it last summer when we'd been married for eight and a half years
and that we can just sit together and sip on coffee
and that when i've been too busy you tell me to just stop and sit with you
and that you know what i need before i do sometimes
and i'm so glad that you do
i'm so grateful that the Giver of Good and Perfect Gifts saw fit to give me you and you me
and that makes what we have together good and perfect
always through His grace
i love you
~Elizabeth
i'm definitely going to get this printed out and framed . . .
after so many of you commented on this particular photo, i had a bit of fun with it on picnik, and this is what i came up with. i'm going to hang it in our home somewhere - i'll let you know where it ends up.
thanks for the inspiration, friends!
sometimes i feel as though i am just hanging on by a thread. and this morning that thread was awfully frayed. thank goodness he doesn't take pleasure in snapping the thread, but in binding the frayed bits together and wrapping his arms around me . . . meeting my wild tears with love.
the card on the table . . . it lists projects, work, bills, money, committments, laundry, trash, errands, relatives, car, shopping, in-laws, deadlines, calls, obligations, dishes . . . over and over and over . . . you get the idea. then in the middle it says "somewhere in the middle of it all . . ." and inside it says, "is a quiet place called love. i'll meet you there."
but this morning, the quietness, it was eluding me. all the other stuff was swirling around threatening to overwhelm me. and i was trying to make this morning - this 31st birthday morning - beautiful, happy, peaceful. and instead he had to soothe me. to calm me. and now he's off at work in the cold, swirling snow. i did tell him that i love him. over and over. and that i'm so sorry i cried on this morning, his birthday. and we did give him dark chocolate. the only treat he eats. and oh, will he savour it. and if the snow dies down, we'll go get steaks that i'll do for supper. with baked potatoes. and some sort of greens. his favorite meal. and we'll call him in a bit and tell him how we love him.
i'm so grateful for this love.
Happy Birthday, Ben. Happy Birthday, Love. Happy Birthday, My Best Friend. Happy Birthday.
a drive that is oh-so-worth-it, to a place that is oh-so-beautiful
(and for those of you we didn't see {we only saw Ben's family} we love you. i wish we could have hugged and visited and sipped coffee and thrown rocks with you all. we needed a quiet weekend, just the four of us. i know you understand.)climbing at Gooseberry Falls
hiking in the Kadunce Creek
camping on the shore
finding beauty in little things
and in the big things
for two wonderful nights, and three whole days, just the four of us
taking some deep breaths,
resting in the beauty God has created,
preparing for the project that we started today!
we've been spending lot of time with my grandma since saturday. she was in the hospital friday night through this afternoon - some strange heart rhythms causing dizziness and weakness - but, i think they are regulated. today she got to move to my mom and dad's house. and she is on the mend. she's been cheerful through it all, and enjoying our reading and singing and visiting. i know that lots of prayers and visits and songs and kiddo smiles and homemade cookies and good medicine and great doctors and nurses are what has helped her out. she's got a few good years left in her, i'm sure. after all, she's only 91. and one of her dear friends just passed away at 102! she's definitely got some cookie eating and story listening left to do!
Thinking back to the beginning . . .
Benjamin Isaac was born January 18, 2005 at 5:58 p.m. He was 18 inches long and weighed 5 pounds, 14 ounces. (He was just over a month early.)
Shortly after he was born,
Isaac took a trip to the NICU,
in a city 2 hours away
from where he was born,
where they worked on his lungs
for a long time and gave him surfactant and lots of oxygen
and special care.
I saw Isaac for a moment before he left. And in that moment, I had a very strong sense of a huge guardian angel watching over him and going with him.
Ben brought this picture to me the next day. I couldn't leave the hospital - I'd had a c-section - so I didn't see or hold my little boy for 2 1/2 days.
Even when he lost weight so he was just over 5 lbs, he was by far the biggest baby in the NICU!
And so a year flew by . . .
Isaac started walking at 17 months; until then, he was the fastest crawler, ever!
2nd Birthday
First catch!
Almost 3 years old.
Last year on this day I wrote :: And, dear Isaac, now you are 4. Wow, buddy! This all goes so fast. But you are so amazing! For week or so before your birthday, you were really worried about getting older. So, I kept telling you all the cool things you are going to get to do the older you get - go to work more often with Dad, go hunting and fishing more often with Dad, learn to read, learn to ride a bike with no training wheels, oh, oodles of stuff. On your birthday I picked you up and gave you a hug and you, with a HUGE grin on your face, said, "I'm 4. And you can still hold me!" Yep. And I'll hold you in my arms for a long time, and in my heart for ever.
And today I can say - You are 5! And you've learned to ride a bike without training wheels. And you are learning to read. And I can still hold you - even though you are quite a bit taller! You're still kind of a skinny sort of a guy. :) And you have learned to ice-skate. And you are such a thinker. You have a huge imagination - I love to watch you play.
Happy Birthday, Isaac! May your joy be full - all of your days!
full of these fun, happy, silly, smiley, lovely people ::
go ahead. smile. they sure make me smile, too.
