who found my cookie recipe on tuesday evening, and mixed up a double batch, baked a pan ful, wrote me a card, and helped her brother write one for me as well, all while ben was studying and i was working my last shift! so i came home to this
and i sat down with a glass of milk and dunked cookies and munched away (oh yum!) as i reflected on my last 2 1/2 years of working away from my home and family. i liked my job (usually). but i did not like juggling keeping my home and teaching my kids and helping my husband and finding sitters and going off to work. we all four did our part to keep things going smoothly. the kiddos didn't moan and fuss about going to one more sitters house or doing one more blitz pick-up so someone could come here to watch them or watching one more movie so mom could get a nap. they just hung in there and even helped out. so often they made me lunch or wrote me little notes or ran out to start the car . . . they've been such troopers. things that they've wanted to do or have me do have been put on hold, and they've learned from that, i know. my wonderful ben made suppers for him and the kiddos most of the evenings i was working. sometimes i was able to leave something in the crockpot for them and sometimes my mom made supper for them, and very rarely ben took them out for supper, but most of the time, ben cooked something. he also has pitched in with breakfasts and other house chore sorts of things. we've kept each other going.
and now, now i'll be able to settle in - maybe even to a routine! - where i'll be able to work and play with the kiddos and work on and enjoy things in my home for more hours of the day, and i'll be able to make supper for my family - every night! (you gals who get to do that - know it's a blessing - even when it seems like it's a chore, it's really a blessing to be able to put something on the table for your family - even if it's just popcorn and beef jerky and cheese and apple slices, or a simple soup and grilled cheese - you get to be with them and shower them with love and care and a comfortable place to end the day.)
and i read and reread the cards from my kiddos
when i gave my notice at work, i offered to stay on as an intermittent (you know, they could call me if they had open shifts and i could fill in once in a while), but apparently, there is no opening for an intermittent CNA right now, so, i am just done. over the past few months, we could see God slowly closing the door on that job, and i guess His intention was to close it all the way - at least for now. i think i am relieved.
so, now we get a couple weeks to regroup and settle and see some people we love, and situate some things in our home, and take a deep breath. a lot of deep breaths.
and yesterday, maddie got the bowl of cookie dough out of the fridge, and baked two more pans of cookies. i snuck around and snapped some pictures of her and made her laugh. :)
ahhh. home, sweet home.
